Getting a girl can seem like the most difficult thing in the world, especially if you don’t know where to begin. Getting a girl in one night is a special challenge because there isn’t much time for you to get to know each other—but it can be done! Whether you want a one-night stand or a long-term relationship, there are a few tricks you can use to pick up a woman in a single evening.
Part 1: Putting Your Best Face Forward
1. Brush your hair, wash your face, and apply deodorant to your body. Do you want women to see you at your best? The first step is to master basic grooming habits, so don’t forget to spruce up before you leave the house.
If you want to wear perfume or cologne, keep it light. People can be turned off by a strong odour (or even give them a headache).
If you normally wear makeup, go ahead and put some on! Whatever makes you feel relaxed and at ease.
2. Put on clean, flattering clothing. You are not required to dress for a black tie event, especially if you are going to a club or a bar. Choose simple clothes that make you look and feel good (and that are clean and wrinkle-free!) and that are appropriate for the occasion.
Dress up if you’re going somewhere really fancy (like a dinner party).
Choose dark wash jeans, a basic T-shirt, and a structured jacket for a more masculine look.
Try high waisted jeans, a crop top, and booties for a more feminine look.
3. Demonstrate open, confident body language. Look around and make eye contact with others before smiling. Instead of crossing your arms or legs, keep your body open to appear more approachable. Put your phone away and remove your headphones so you don’t appear too preoccupied to talk.
Grab a drink to sip if you want to do something with your hands.
Try to avoid looking at your phone as much as possible. Women will be less likely to approach you if they believe you are engrossed in your technology.
Finding a Woman, Part 2
1. Visit the bars and clubs in your neighbourhood. People who visit these locations are more likely to be open to a relationship in general (short-term or long-term). Begin by going to a local establishment frequented by people your age, such as a bar, a nightclub, or a houseparty.
Remember, even if you’re going to a club or a bar, you don’t have to drink alcohol if you don’t want to. Soda is completely safe!
When you’re both in a party mood, approaching a woman will be much easier. Approaching women on the street while they are out and about can be difficult, and it may make them feel uneasy.
2. Seek out a woman who appears to be open to being approached. If she is bouncing around and talking to other people, catches your eye and smiles, or has open body language, she probably wouldn’t mind if you approached her and spoke to her. Catch her eye and smile to see if she’s interested, and don’t take it personally if she’s not.
Don’t automatically assume that every woman you see is single or looking for a relationship. Just because she’s in a bar or a nightclub doesn’t mean she’s looking for something right now.
She’s probably not interested if she’s wearing headphones or is in the middle of something (like reading a book).
3. Approach with a light, upbeat tone of voice. Discuss something trivial, such as the weather or the song that is currently playing. The goal is not to have a deep conversation; rather, it is to assess her body language and whether she is receptive (and for her to check you out too).
“I noticed you bobbing your head to the music,” for example. I enjoy this song as well!”
Remember, women are people, too! There’s no need to start with a cheesy pickup line or a heavy flirtation.
Respect her personal space and avoid getting too close too quickly.
4. Inquire about her personal life. This is your opportunity to get to know her a little better. Inquire about her name, the type of night she’s having, and what she does for a living. Keep an eye on how she reacts to determine whether or not she is interested.
Try a question like, “So, are you here with your friends?”
If she responds to all of your questions and asks some of her own, it indicates that she is likely interested in continuing the conversation.
If you’re getting one-word answers, it’s probably time to wrap it up and move on.
5. Examine her body language to see if she’s interested. A woman may express her feelings for you by touching you on the arm, making eye contact, and laughing at your jokes (even if they aren’t particularly funny). You’re probably doing something right if she’s mirroring your body language and leaning in to talk to you!
If she crosses her arms, does not meet your gaze, or turns away from you, she is probably not interested.
These aren’t hard and fast rules, and every woman is different. Look for open body language, but don’t rely entirely on it.
6. If she doesn’t seem interested in you, move on. If the woman you’re speaking with isn’t sending you signals, it’s best to end the conversation and go somewhere else. Trying to persuade a woman to like you is unlikely to end well, and you may end up making her feel uncomfortable.
You can walk away with a smile and a “Have a good evening, thanks for the chat.”
Even when they don’t want to talk, some women find it difficult to say no. Make an effort not to make her feel uncomfortable.
Part 3: Closing the Deal
1. Give her a few compliments. Discuss her hair, eyes, outfit, or smile, or something similar. It’s a good sign if she appears pleased rather than awkward!
Try something like, “I love your hair!” It looks great with the hair pulled back like that.”
She may even return your compliment, which is a good sign.
Don’t go overboard with compliments. Stick to one or two so that you don’t appear overly eager.
2. Break through the touch barrier. Try brushing some lint from her sleeve or laughing while placing a hand on her shoulder. Find an excuse to gently touch her arm or shoulder (nothing more) to see if she is comfortable with it. If she doesn’t pull away or if she touches you back, it’s a good indication that she’s interested in you.
Don’t push it if she pulls back or appears uneasy.
3. If you want to hook up with her, invite her to leave with you. You could suggest going back to your place or somewhere more private. Make sure you do this after you’ve established that she’s interested in you and after you’ve had a nice conversation for a while.
Some women are wary of going home with someone they’ve just met (which is totally normal). She might suggest returning to her house or simply exchanging phone numbers instead.
4. If you’re looking for something more serious, ask to exchange phone numbers. Taking someone home the first time you meet them does not give the impression that you are interested in a relationship. If you want to go on a date, suggest exchanging phone numbers and discussing when you can meet up next.
If she is only interested in hooking up, she may invite you to her home instead of exchanging numbers. You can choose whether or not to do so.
5. Accept rejection if it comes your way. Even if you’ve been getting good vibes all night, that doesn’t mean a woman is interested in you. Don’t be offended if you propose taking her home or exchanging phone numbers and she says no! Consider it a lesson learned, and thank her for a lively and informative conversation.
Getting angry or pressuring a woman to spend more time with you will never work and will only make her feel uncomfortable.
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