There’s no denying it: breakups are difficult. They can become even more complicated when your ex calls to say he misses you. Before you respond, read through these responses and choose one that best expresses your true feelings. You can tell your ex what you really think of him with a few well-placed words (and whether or not you miss him, too).
1. Nothing at all.
You don’t have to give him your time if you don’t want to. It may be best not to respond if your relationship ended badly or he cheated on you. If he continues to contact you, you may want to block his phone number.
This is also true if he texts you at inconvenient times in the morning. He’s probably not being honest if he only texts you late at night or while he’s drunk.
2. “I’m sorry, but I no longer have feelings for you.”
Allow him to fall gently. If you’ve moved on (or are attempting to move on), make it clear to him. It’s a gentle yet firm way of letting him down and informing him that he must let you go.
Don’t be surprised if he doesn’t respond to such a text. He may be hurt and require some time to himself.
If he responds and becomes enraged, it may be best to block his phone number.
3. “You have a relationship.”
Remind him that he now needs to be concerned about someone else. While receiving a “I miss you” from an ex can be flattering, staying in contact with him if he’s dating someone new isn’t fair to that person. Inform your ex that you and he cannot talk while he is with someone else.
Your ex’s new boo has no idea you two are still in touch. It’s not nice of your ex to catch them off guard like that.
4. “I’m in a relationship.”
Inform him that you are unavailable. Texting your ex when you have a new partner is dangerous, and you may want to ignore his texts entirely. However, if your ex was unaware that you were seeing someone, you can inform him so that he (hopefully) stops contacting you.
If you and your new partner are serious about each other, you might even tell them that your ex texted you. That way, there will be no issues with trust later on.
Even if you are not in a relationship, you can use this excuse to stop your ex from contacting you.
5. “You only miss the thought of me.”
People frequently look back on all of the positive aspects of a relationship. You can, however, remind your ex of why you two split up in the first place. If he asks what you mean, explain all the negative aspects of your relationship and why you two would never work out as a couple again.
For example, you could say, “Remember how diametrically opposed our interests are?” You’d end up with your friends, while I’d be with mine. We didn’t spend much time together.”
6. “Then why did you end your relationship with me?”
If you’ve been dumped, ask him why. If you’re looking for closure in your relationship, this is a good response to use. If he reaches out again without an explanation, force him to explain what he did and why he did it. If he truly wants to get back with you, he will be able to talk through everything without hesitation.
This one will really catch him off guard. If you think he misses you or can’t believe he’d try that line on you after everything he’s done, simply respond with a laughing emoji or a “lmfao.” This is a pretty scathing response, and he should get the hint. If he’s wise, he won’t respond again.
This is an excellent response to use if he attempts to contact you late at night or while drunk.
8. Change the subject.
Move on from the “I miss you” phase. If you were having a conversation before, just carry on as if nothing had happened. If you received an unexpected message, you could say something like, “Speaking of missing, have you seen my blue sweater?” I can’t seem to find it anywhere.”
“Yeah, I miss your dog a lot. “How is she getting along?”
9. “I’m doing really well right now. I’m not missing you.”
Inform him that you’ve moved on from him. This curt response should put him on the spot and cause him to reconsider. If he continues to contact you, you can block his number or tell him to stop.
Don’t let your ex’s approach derail your progress. If you were doing well in the past, keep it up!
10. “I miss you too.”
Choose this option only if you want to rekindle your relationship. Before you respond, consider why the relationship ended and what it might look like in the future. If you believe you and your ex have a real chance at reconciliation, give him the response he most likely wants to hear.
If you receive a late-night or drunk text, this is not the time to talk about your relationship. If your ex calls you in the middle of the day and wants to talk, you can be open to having a conversation with him.
Creative Commons License