The transition from living with your parents to living with your parents after previously being on your own, having a job, and living your own life can be difficult. It is possible to experience a great deal of pressure from them while taking care of their financial affairs and fulfilling the role of “breadwinner” in the household. Parents can become extremely demanding and controlling of your adult life while you are still living under their roof in some extreme cases. A more complicated relationship between a parent and their now-adult child may result as a result of this. Despite this, we can’t ignore the fact that our parents are the most important people in our lives. We are unable to simply walk away from them because we have reached adulthood. They were the ones who had been there for you during your adolescence to support you, love you, guide you, and teach you. You would not be sitting here right now reading this article if it weren’t for them. If you are still living with them due to financial reasons or because you are assisting them with a medical issue, maintain your confidence that you are doing the right thing. You should continue reading if you are experiencing difficulties getting along with your parents as an adult living in their home!
Part 1 Respecting your parent’s space
1. Recognize that, no matter how much your parents adore you, they still consider their home to be theirs. Despite the fact that you may make a financial contribution, this is not the same situation as any other payment for shelter arrangement; your parents are accustomed to things being done their way, and everything is dependent on them having funded it in the first place. Treat it as if it were a “first come, first served” situation. Most importantly, be willing to share and be prepared to make quick concessions on issues that you know are important to them in order to maintain their level of comfort and privacy.
Part 2 Respecting your parent’s wishes and choices
1. Always keep your parents’ wishes in mind when making decisions. The fact that they aren’t your children means that they aren’t in a position to defer to your preferences. If they insist on watching a particular television programme that you do not agree with, show your respect by walking away. Be proactive and set things up so that you have your own space so that you don’t accidentally bump into theirs, such as purchasing your own television, watching things online, or visiting a friend’s place for those “must watch” things that your parents don’t care about.
2. Accept the fact that your options will be different. Your choices will differ in everything from what you wear to what they eat. This in no way implies that either of you is correct or incorrect. Each individual has the right to live their life in the manner in which they choose. As much as you respect and value your own choices, you should do the same for theirs.
3. It’s important to be subtle when sharing your likes, preferences, and lifestyle with others. Never be afraid to express yourself, but always do so in a respectful manner. They may actually be more accepting of you once they have a better understanding of the situation. Over time, your preferences may even come to be preferred by them.
4. You should remember that just because you have reached adulthood does not mean that the golden rule “obey and respect your parents” (or something along those lines) has vanished into thin air. No, not at all, buddy. That is a rule that will last a lifetime. Live with it, and try to be as happy as possible while doing so. It contributes to the reduction of unneeded controversy.
Part 3 Keeping the peace
1. Pay attention to your parents. When it comes to the running of the household, decisions about home management, and the way routines are followed, you can expect to be deferred to and positively responded to when it comes to their preferences. While it is important to respond and react to what your parents are saying, it is also important to truly listen to what they are saying and understand their point of view. Every time you speak, you are not required to add something new to what they are saying to be effective. This will prevent the majority of those conversations from devolving into heated debates.
2. Do not create or feed arguments into the system. If you know they will disagree with you on a particular point you wish to introduce to them, simply tell them to give your point of view some thought and to concentrate on the positive aspects of your point. As part of a conversation or meeting with your parents, give them the opportunity to express their own points of view first, allowing them to become more easily adaptable to the information you really want them to take in. Your level of success, on the other hand, may be determined by the type of parents you have. It is possible that you will be forced to completely disagree with them if they are always dictatorial; however, if they are understanding, you will be able to discuss the issues as they arise.
Part 4 Being a usefully contributing member of the household
1. Take personal responsibility. Take good care of your own possessions. Expect your parents to be less willing to go into care mode and do your laundry, cleaning, and other household chores than they were when you were a child. You are now completely self-sufficient, and you must demonstrate this fact at all times.. If you do decide to allow someone to assist you with your belongings, make sure that it is part of an agreement in which you are providing them with something of equal value or effort in return.
2. Make things happen for your parents. You will be of great assistance to them and will demonstrate to them your ability to be responsible. This will have a significant positive impact on the happiness of the household.
Make the extra effort to meet their needs, regardless of the differences you may have between you. While your parents may not express it often enough, even the tiniest, most insignificant gesture toward them can make them feel loved and help to fill the void created by generation gaps. Consider preparing their favourite meal for them, leaving a sweet note on the counter for them, or taking care of a household chore that they are normally responsible for. Never forget to express your gratitude to them for allowing you to reside in their home.
Part 5 Caring for your parents
1. If your parents are elderly, you should keep a close eye on their health. It is possible that the mood swings and irritability of much older parents are the result of an underlying medical condition or illness. They may be irritable or angry as a result of an internal change or an underlying pain that they are experiencing. To elicit information about their health and to assist them with doctor’s visits and other appointments, ask compassionate questions.
2. Keep your parents close to your heart. We will all have to leave this planet at some point. The fact is that we only have one life to live. It is important to live it in the proper manner. Recognize that your parents are too special to take for granted if you are fortunate enough to have both of your parents. Perhaps, one day, when you reach the same age as they are, you will fully appreciate how brief life truly is at that point. Make today a day that you will be able to look back on and smile because of the memories you have shared with those you care about.
Even if you become irritated by their numerous, perhaps slightly infuriating habits, remember that they have always been there for you; and don’t imagine for a moment that they haven’t felt the same way about your actions at some point in their lives. They, too, have had to put up with your “many, perhaps slightly infuriating” habits when you were a child, adolescent, or even an adult, because they were a part of your upbringing. The ability to be patient is essential for living a happy life.
3. Make a list of your blessings. The fact is that there are millions of people who are homeless because they have no family or friends to lean on. The next time your parents start to nag you about something, just remember to be grateful for the gift of shelter and the fact that cement wasn’t your pillow last night.
Rather than treating them like an inconvenience, you should view them as a gift from which you can benefit from their hard work and unconditional love. Remember, there were times when you were young and may have behaved in a “nuisance” manner, but they always treated you as if you were a gift from God. The only way to repay their kindness is to treat them in the same manner in which they treated you.
Just keep in mind that you are fortunate to have parents. Consider what your life would be like if you didn’t have them. Even after they have passed away from this earth, they are still present in spirit, but they are not physically present to give you a hug. Never feel bad about the fact that you are still living with your parents. There is no way you can imagine how much they care about you. If you have a problem, tell them and try to come to an agreement; however, don’t go overboard because you are staying in their home!
Do not treat them as if they are a burden. Treating your parents as an additional responsibility increases the likelihood that you will be unable to fully appreciate the experience of being with them during that time period. Try to take pleasure in their association, just as you did when you were a child. Recognize that you have now been placed in the opposite role. Your parents have taken on the role of your childhood self, and you will be responsible for them as an adult. In this relationship, try to instil happiness. Together, you can celebrate birthdays and wedding anniversaries by hugging and cuddling each other. Make their lives more enjoyable!
Allow your children to interact with your parents. If you have children, make certain that they spend quality time with their grandmothers and grandfathers, as well. In today’s fast-paced world, when couples are sharing financial responsibilities together, it is essential that someone in the household is responsible for the children’s well-being. Parents are the only ones who can provide better security and care for your children than you. It is also more likely that your children will take care of you if they see how you are caring for your parents in the present and the future. Isn’t it true that examples are more than just spoken words?
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