How to Write a Letter to a Girl Outlining Your Respect for Her

There’s always that one girl you can’t stop thinking about. Perhaps she is already a friend of yours. Maybe she has no idea you exist. In any case, you want to write her something that will impress her and show her how much you adore her. Some people choose poetry or love letters, but if you lack the confidence or finesse to do so, or if she’s the type of girl who doesn’t like that sort of thing, consider a letter of respect. No girl on the planet would turn down one of these, and if you do it well, she’ll be both flattered and empowered by what you say.


1. Make the decision to respect her. If you don’t think she’s deserving of your respect, don’t write her a phoney letter about it.

2. Make a separate list of everything you admire about this girl. Concentrate on her personality traits rather than her appearance. This list is separate from your letter so that you can refer to it while writing if you forget or overlook something.

Things you admire can be any personal quality or action that is not a physical characteristic. Instead of complimenting her hair or clothes, tell her you admire her creativity or sense of style. Instead of telling her she’s a great athlete, tell her you admire her determination and perseverance.

3. Sort the things you admire or respect into groups so that your letter has a coherent body rather than sounding like a list of bullet points. Personality traits, talents and abilities, and her opinions are examples of categories to include.

4. Begin the letter as you would any other. Inform her of your identity, the reason for your writing, and the subject of your work. Put your personality into it, but don’t say anything too serious, such as confessing your undying love for her or admitting how much time you spend thinking about her. Just stick to what you want her to know, which is that you respect and admire her and want to tell her so. She will appreciate being treated as a real person rather than a prize. Step 4: Write a Letter to a Girl Outlining Your Respect for Her

5. Write the letter’s body. Take each of your categories and write one to three sentences for each trait within it. If you can think of any, give specific examples of her displaying these characteristics. This will show her that you are paying attention to what she is doing. If she has ever been especially nice or helpful to you, or if she has had a significant impact on your life (other than losing sleep), now is a good time to bring it up. She’ll appreciate the fact that you don’t take her for granted.

While describing her, avoid using examples that may appear stalker-like. Stick to things that everyone knows, such as a recognised achievement or something that all of her friends are aware of. You risk scaring her away if you admit to knowing something she doesn’t expect you to know.

6. Make a conclusion. Your letter’s conclusion should be a brief summary of what you admire about her and how she makes you feel. Again, if your emotions are particularly strong and she is unaware of it, introduce this concept gradually. Reduce strong romantic feelings to “I like and admire you and want to get to know you better” status for the purposes of this letter. Finish with a closing phrase such as “respectfully yours, (your name).”

7. Hand over the letter to her. All that remains is for you to ensure that she receives the letter. The best way to accomplish this is to give it to her in person. Actually, that is the only way to ensure she receives it. If you leave it somewhere for her to find it, it may be moved or ignored, or she may fail to notice it. If you give it to someone else to give to her, they may read it first or simply forget. Gather your courage and simply hand her the item. In the absence of that, you could theoretically mail it to her, but you’d have to explain why you need her mailing address. Best wishes and happy writing!

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